I have been in Georgia for 2 weeks now. (If you aren’t sure what I’m doing here check out my last blog or the video I posted on my Facebook) The first week here was spent at a retreat center, processing this last season that I was in and getting ready to enter a new season, in a new state, with new people that I, for the most part, didn’t know at all.
I returned home from the Race in November only to fall back into my old life and bad habits. I wasn’t getting in the word daily like I did on the race and I was letting people influence me negatively. Jesus was not my priority. I was my priority. Watching netflix and youtube, scrolling aimlessly on social media, sleeping all day with the excuse that “I’m tired, I had an exhausting year.”
Finally in January, I went to Project Search light. This was a time at adventures in missions(where I am now in Georgia. The same organization that puts on the world race) where we would debrief our world race experience, see our friends and just spend some time reflecting. Worship, sessions, processing and hanging out was what our days consisted of and it was really nice. During this time they had what was called “prophetic rooms” basically a place where you would go into a room and the people(that you didn’t know AT ALL) in that room would just pray for you and over you and listen to the Lord asking if there was anything He wanted to tell you. Well, I decided to try it and let me tell you, it broke me. In a good way.
I entered the room and sat down, the two people began to pray for me. After a minute of silence the guy looked at me and said “The Lord is giving me a picture of a ballroom(think beauty and the beast), you’re in the center of the room dancing with papa. (*Tears* beautiful right? Oh, it gets so much better!) The Lord wants you to enter into a season of just the two of you. He is asking you to stop focusing on the people around you, stop looking at your beautiful gown and just dance with him.” Ok, I was seriously crying. I needed that and I knew that everything he was saying was true. There was silence as he continued to listen for more from the Lord. I dried my tears and after about two minutes he looked up at me, and smiling, he broke the silence saying “Do you know the song ‘Cinderella’ by Steven Curtis Chapman?” Ok, now I started to cry again. I couldn’t imagine where he could possibly be going with this but all I knew was that I LOVED that song and at 14 years old I vowed that I would play that song at my wedding as I danced with my dad. I whispered a “yes” as the tears slowly escaped my eyes against my will and attempt to fight them back. He continued “That’s the song you’re dancing to with the Father.” As I begin to sob he says “Does that resonate with you at all? UM YES. “I believe the Lord is just asking you to enter into a season of just the two of you. Dance with papa.”
And I did.
Here I sit 2 and a half months later, and the Lord just keeps calling me deeper into this season all the time.
Yesterday I was in the car listening to a song I just discovered called “Lights Go Out”, the lyrics say “When the lights go out, it’s gonna be me and you.” I have been jammin’ to this song man. When this world fails me, when I fail this world, when I’ve lost friends and family to death or seasons changing, when I move across the world to serve the Lord and I am more lonely than ever. It’s just gonna He and I, dancing together. He is my papa. My earthly father is gone and has been for about 6 years now, Jesus is the only father I have now. The truth is, that hurts, it’s sad and it’s scary to know that in some way everyone I love will be gone one day, that they will all fail me. But I have hope. Because I am forever in the arms of my heavenly Father. No man will every be able to love me the same way my Father does.
So, I am loving life in Georgia. I am striving, thriving and surviving.
I am dancing with Jesus and I couldn’t be more joyful.
Until next time…
